Always live up to your standards — by lowering them, if necessary. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, 1966

The other week I felt like I had hit a wall with my writing and I couldn’t get over or around it; it felt like writer’s block and the more I thought about how hard it was for me to write, the harder it became.

The pressure I put on myself to write the “perfect” piece loomed over my head and I just couldn’t do it: I couldn’t write.

I tried mediation. I took a walk. I took a nap. Nothing. The desire to create and string words together to create something amazing was intense. I was fraught with frustration.

During this writer’s block, my younger son had been struggling with learning a new skateboard trick: the ollie. He had “chicken foot” and was getting frustrated.

“Give yourself permission to fall or to get a scrape. Give yourself permission to lower your bar: the ollie doesn’t have to be perfect. Just have fun boarding with your friends” I said to him.

When he returned from the skatepark, he had a scraped elbow, a bruised knee and a hole in his pants. Despite the injuries, he was sporting a big grin: he had improved his ollie and had a great day at the skatepark.

Later that evening, I took my own advice: I lowered my bar and gave myself permission to write whatever it was that came out of my head. If the words that came out didn’t make sense, it fine. The only thing that mattered was getting words out my head and on paper.

I closed my eyes for a few minutes and then took pen to paper and wrote about things that bubbled to the surface: feelings, fears, and lists. Finally, the skies opened and the clouds parted: words flowed out effortlessly and easily; I created a piece that moved me spiritually and emotionally; it was a piece that delivered a message I had been trying to articulate for a long time.

Thinking back to that experience, I can see that it wasn’t “writer’s block” that was in my way, it was the idea of perfection. By giving myself permission to lower the bar and just write, the creative process flowed.

Lowering the bar took away the pressure and brought forth results that were meaningful and impactful – and that’s a standard I’m happy to live up to.