Don’t be discouraged. It’s often the last key in the bunch that opens the lock. ~Author Unknown

It is very hard for me to articulate some of the frustrations that are the roller coaster of Lyme, it’s a daily struggle. My email response to my younger son’s teacher may be the closest I can get to sharing my experience.

Good evening Ms. Lynch,

I am writing again to let you know that C did not prepare for any exam or quiz retakes as I suggested. He came in today to check on 2 zeros that I have asked him to complete in class multiple times. He did not have the workbook pages done and he decided not to sit down and do them at lunch. C did not pass Spanish A and I recommend that he retake Spanish A if he decides to continue in the World Language academic elective. He has truly struggled to maintain attention for even a portion of the lessons this year. I hope that he can better manage his focus and behavior. Have a pleasant summer! – Ms. C

I used to get upset about my son’s behavior and would worry about his academic success. It took trust and patience to step back, let go a bit, and let him figure it out; with that in mind, I thought about how to respond in a way that reflected these goals for my son.

Good morning Ms. C,

Thank you for your email regarding my son’s progress in Spanish and the status of his final grade. I am sorry Connor did not meet your expectations in class this year.

A year ago, I would have beat myself up and concluded that I was a bad mom and my kid was a bad student, however, after a year of managing his Lyme, I know that is not the case. My son is the individual he is and is doing the best he can considering the challenges he faces.

I know how much he hates rote work and memorizing class material; I also know how much he enjoyed the hands-on experiences in your classroom: the skits, making guacamole, and creating PowerPoint presentations. C has now made guacamole for our family twice and it is wonderful. I am content knowing he has taken some of his classroom learning and applied it outside the classroom.

I’ve also learned that my son is independent, stubborn, and has a very sensitive side. While I am disappointed he didn’t try to bring his grade up, it is he who will live with the fact that he failed to get an “acceptable” letter grade. Perhaps one day he will get excited about learning Spanish and find a way to learn that is not memorizing, worksheets and tests.

Living with Lyme, I know this disease is not a one-size-fits-all and that few people understand what our family is going through. My job is to continue to support my son in whatever way, shape, or form he needs. While C excelled in all of his other classes, I am sorry Spanish was not at the top of his list and that he was a disappointment to you this year.

I wish you all the best next year!

Karen

This grade is just one grade. It does not define who he is or what he will become. We have a choice: we can dwell on this forever, or accept the fact that this was a Life Lesson. My son has chosen the Life Lesson route.

Bring on the guacamole!